Before the parade passes by, let’s twirl a baton for the 50th anniversary of the Hello, Dolly! movie, which premiered in December 1969 and went on to win three Oscars. The candy-colored musical—based on Thornton Wilder’s The Matchmaker—starred an incandescent Carol Channing when it opened on Broadway in 1964. Carol was so delicious in the lovable yenta role that she even won the Tony over a young upstart named Barbra Streisand for something called Funny Girl.

But Babs had the last laugh, nabbing the part of Dolly Levi in the film version and vamping in the role like a sort of young Mae West. The lavish, Gene Kelly-directed film has its detractors, but I’m not the only one who feels like I’m returning to the Harmonia Gardens every time I give it another glance.

Barbra Streisand and director Gene Kelly.

As we prepare to celebrate a half century of the Dolly! film, I talked to Barbra impressionist extraordinaire Steven Brinberg, who’s latest Simply Barbra show features songs from and stories about the movie, as well as other Streisand hits right up to her most recent album, Walls. Brinberg has been touring with this show and will bring it to NYC’s The Green Room 42 at Yotel on November 6.

Hello, Steven. How did Barbra land this movie?

She was the hottest thing on earth at the time. That was one that [producer] Freddie Brisson didn’t buy for his wife, Rosalind Russell, so who else were they gonna get but Barbra? Barbra says she told them to get Carol Channing, but I guess Thoroughly Modern Millie was Carol’s audition and she was too much. I don’t think it would have gotten the money together with Carol.

Steven Brinberg as Barbra Streisand.

Do you believe Barbra really told them to cast Carol?

Not entirely. She’s said that. And she has said she didn’t think she herself was right for it, but now when you watch it, it’s like watching a great old MGM musical, even though it’s 20th Century Fox. She’s 26 but looks like 35 in that heavy makeup. When you put that period look on a woman, that happens—like in Funny Lady, she was in her 30s but looked 50. If you put it on her now for Gypsy, she’d look 50. That’s how it works. It would be fine for Gypsy. And now they have CGI. Besides, as I used to joke, “If you look at the album, it says ‘Gypsy—a Musical Fable.' Fable!”

Love it! But back to Dolly.

The Dolly movie’s becoming appreciated, though still maybe not by her. Ryan Murphy watches it every Christmas, but Barbra said, “I find it kind of old timey.” She favors things more serious.

And Carol Channing’s reaction?

Carol was quoted as saying, “Every time I go on an airplane, they’re showing Hello, Dolly! starring Barbra Streisand.” She told Larry King that Barbra was tremendous in all her pictures except that one. She said, “It was a flop, but it would have been if I did it, too.” It actually made a lot of money, but it cost so much that it didn’t yield a profit right away.

Did Barbra get along with her legendary director, Gene Kelly?

His widow says he loved Barbra, and [costar] Walter Matthau was the one causing the problems because he was jealous of her. She was the biggest thing in the world. But they must have become friends. In 1986, I went to the One Voice concert in her backyard and Matthau was there. I thought, “Why isn’t this all over the newspapers? The feud is all over!”

But many have assumed that Barbra was the mean one, and they both hated each other.

I have a friend who was a dancer in the movie and said she was great, no problem. When they did the title number with a million extras, she looked at one of the dancers and said, “I want to screw this up so we can do this again”—just to enjoy doing the number again. She got in on the last gasp of musicals. If she hadn’t done Funny Girl, she probably would have just been a really successful singer. If so, you wonder who they would have gotten for Dolly—Doris Day, Julie Andrews, or Liz Taylor.

They wouldn’t have Mae West-ed it up like Barbra did.

It’s not as many Mae West moments as you think, but they’re so memorable. The way she undresses a waiter with her eyes. The way she says “It’s a little lumpy, but it rings.” It’s a little Brooklyn Barbra, which is why they took out the “Gallaghers” from the dialogue.

Dolly is actually Irish and had been married to a Jew.

Though it’s not certain if he was Jewish.

But do you feel she played Dolly as Irish?

No, not really. But I love the energy. Dancing in the title number and throwing her arms up. The look on her face. When [singer-trumpeter] Louis Armstrong appears out of nowhere, it’s wonderful.

Filming Hello, Dolly!.

Did she get along with songwriter Jerry Herman?

I don’t know that he was even around so much. But she loved patter songs, which is why he wrote “Just Leave Everything To Me” for the movie, which is so much better than the song it replaced, “I Put My Hand In.” I don’t know why they don’t make that switch in stage productions. And the other song they added, “Love Is Only Love," is actually a cut song from Mame.

It’s a lovely song. Did they interpolate it to give Barbra another ballad?

I think so. She doesn’t sing that many songs in the film. There are lots of ensemble songs. In my show, I joke, “They tell me there are a lot of ensemble songs. Is that referring to what I’m going to wear?”

Why was Ann-Margret not chosen for Irene Malloy after testing for it? [They cast the relatively unknown Marianne McAndrew.]

Ann-Margret was so beautiful and spectacular and that might have drawn focus. Or it might have been her agents thinking, “You’re a star.” I saw Marianne in a gay play 20 years ago. In her bio, she said that despite having no singing or dancing ability, she was chosen to star in Hello, Dolly! Nowadays, they let everybody sing, for better or worse, but back then, when they dubbed people, except for when they used Marni Nixon, it didn’t even attempt to match. That’s how Marianne is. Melissa Stafford, one of Dean Martin’s Golddiggers, did her singing, and I think she sounds a lot like Lesley Ann Warren. I’ve never heard about who they might have considered for Cornelius before they got Michael Crawford. People have issues with his performance. He’s over the top and you can hear the English accent.

Do you think maybe Barbra put the kibosh on Ann-Margret?

I suppose we’ll never know.

For What’s Up, Doc?, Barbra knew Madeline Kahn was going to be sensational, but she didn’t mind—though Madeline played a nerd, not a glamour goddess.

She supported her. Interestingly, in all of her 19 movies, Barbra never starred opposite a woman. It’s always her and a leading man. Yet the three movies she directed all got an Oscar nomination for an actress. She’s wonderful with women. Someone should write movies for her and Bette Midler, her and Jessica Lange. People will turn out in droves for something that’s good. Had she done Gypsy or anything like that, it would have been a box office blockbuster. There are a lot of people who are 50 plus and there’s not a lot for them to see.

Danny Lockin (L) and Michael Crawford (R).

On a more tragic note, Danny Lockin, the cutie who played Barnaby in Hello, Dolly!, was murdered in 1977 by a guy he picked up in a bar.

So sad. He had come from shooting The Gong Show. When the Hello, Dolly! movie opened, you could walk around the corner and see him in the stage show with Ethel Merman. He was in both.

Did Barbra see Bette Midler in the most recent Broadway revival?

No, as far as I know. But she did go to see Bette as agent Sue Mengers in I’ll Eat You Last.

She’s mentioned in that!

She likes serious theater and usually goes to see plays. I guess she figures she didn’t need to see Hello, Dolly! because she already did it. No surprises for her.

Now that it’s 50, will the critics come around and say the movie is great?

I think so. Some of them actually have. The movie actually improves on the play in that Dolly alerts Barnaby and Cornelius to go to the hat shop. I think that’s one of the good changes.

What are your personal secrets to doing Barbra?

I have to take care of myself. I need to rest and all that stuff, to hit those notes. What’s so fun about it, as opposed to doing Judy Garland or Marilyn Monroe, is she’s still here and there’s more to draw from. I’m always adding and changing.

Did you like her Walls album?

I like it. It’s interesting because you’re preaching to the converted. A lot of these songs are political, but they’re pretty. I’m surprised that she’s never sung a note of Jerry Herman outside of Hello, Dolly! That song from Dear World—“I Don’t Want to Know”—would have fit right into Walls. She never did “If He Walked Into My Life” from Mame. Maybe she thinks, “When you think of the song, you hear Angela Lansbury and Eydie Gorme.”

And Leslie Uggams.

And Pat Benatar did it, too!

What Barbra obsession is next for you?

It’s the 50th anniversary of On a Clear Day You Can See Forever next year, but they’ve got to find the damned footage. Just before it came out, they got scared and cut 45 minutes, including her duet with Larry Blyden and a Jack Nicholson song where she’s humming in the background. I can’t believe they didn’t keep it safe.

I can’t wait till you celebrate the 50th anniversary of Nuts. Thanks, Steven!

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Judy, Judy, Judy!

As long as I’m interviewing the impersonators of gay icons, I tried to tracked down a longtime Judy Garland drag queen for his take on Renée Zellweger’s acclaimed performance as the diva at the end of her rope in Judy. He didn’t return my repeated calls, which makes me think he’s doing a very good job of impersonating Judy, thank you.

But then, another long-running impressionist, Peter Mac, got back to me with some wise words. Said Peter:

Renee turns in a solid, bravura performance as La Garland. She gets the essence of Judy and captures all of Judy’s vulnerability, maternal warmth, razor sharp, off-handed wit, and the balls to the wall determined diva who never wants to let her audiences down. It’s also clear that she’s working her ass off in the musical moments. Renée has stated clearly that she was told by director Rupert Goold not to do any kind of Judy impersonation. Whether that was a mistake or not, who knows? She’s a dandy singer in her own right and she does a fabulous job at singing those ball breaking Mort Lindsey-Nelson Riddle arrangements as Renée Zellwegger with all of the Garland exuberance behind them.

Sadly, I think the film is a missed opportunity, not because of Renée but via the lackluster, fabricated script. Poetic license is one thing, but there is no need to make anything up where Judy Garland is concerned. The truth of Judy’s life is far more compelling, fascinating, horrifying, and exhilarating than anything that any writer could conjure up. But sadly, as some anonymous source said (and it seems to be the case with this new Judy Garland film and its play predecessor), "The truth is stranger than fiction...but not as popular."

Helleaux!